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I am in a lot of pain !!!


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#1 Mike36

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Posted 01 August 2012 - 06:05 AM

I am a christian male from Romania,age 36,single,and i am all alone.I have lost my entire family(mom,dad and grandma)and i really have no other relatives nor cousins.It is a difficult time for me and i am also struggling with my faith and i guess that i need your encouragements here.I lost my job last year and my life has become in a way impossible and it is so difficult to get/find another job when you live in a country like mine.I live on no income ! I cannot live like this anymore !
I guess i am searching for true christian friends(with whom i can develop a true friendship)with whom i can share my life,my fears,my challenges,my needs etc.It is my hope that this is the place.

I'm praying that God will bring into my life the so needed true christian friends.I am not a strong person so when destruction comes my way all i can do is stay back and take it as it comes.I really have no tools to fight it(write me and i will tell you more why i do not have those tools).At this time i am going through the most toughest times of my life.You will not even believe(if i will tell you)through what i am going right now(simply contact me and i will tell you).
It is difficult to stay strong and,as there is no one here for me,i lose hope instantly.In some ways i don't know why God is allowing me to go through such hard times and also why He does not hear me crying out to Him.I never ever thought life can be sometimes this way or that i will have to endure such extreme moments.I am also sick and of course that i cannot take care of myself due to the fact that i have no medical insurance over here.In some ways,i just don't know how much time i will be able to bear all of these,all that is coming upon me.I am being on my own for so long now and it's like i have come to the end of my powers,to the end of my energy(that is has to do with the fact that i am way unfed now!).Because i am not eating enough or properly i have lost in weight 15 pounds in the last weeks.
I knew that if my family was here with me(especially my step mom)things would have been totally different !
It feels so bad,so so bad,when you are all alone,when you're looking at others and see that they have a family who is there for them in times of need,in times of struggle,someone who comfort them and to give them a loving hug.It is the most ugliest feeling in the world when you belong to no one,when you look around and see that you belong to absolutely no one.After all,i am a human being as well.Sometimes i am wondering: why was i even born into this world ? To be a total stranger ? To suffer only ? I am not sure that this is the life that i want.No.
I cannot live like this anymore.Is there anyone of you will open his heart to me ? Is there anyone of you will want to get involved in my meaningless life ?? Is there anyone of you will reach out his/her hand out to me ?? Is there anyone out here ?
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#2 TimM

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Posted 01 August 2012 - 06:18 AM

Hi Mike. I prayed for you. :) I encourage you to continue to post in the forums. There are a nice handful of Christians here that will talk with you. :)

Edited by TimM, 01 August 2012 - 06:22 AM.

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#3 Mike36

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Posted 01 August 2012 - 06:47 AM

Hi Mike. I prayed for you. :) I encourage you to continue to post in the forums. There are a nice handful of Christians here that will talk with you. :)


Hi Tim.Thank you for your prayer.Ok,i will look forward to those Christians on here that will talk to me.
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#4 lilacday

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Posted 01 August 2012 - 10:20 AM

Mike 36 , you say:

I'm praying that God will bring into my life the so needed true christian friends.I am not a strong person so when destruction comes my way all i can do is stay back and take it as it comes.I really have no tools to fight it(write me and i will tell you more why i do not have those tools).At this time i am going through the most toughest times of my life.You will not even believe(if i will tell you)through what i am going right now(simply contact me and i will tell you).


As a christian you do have many tools. and many weapons. Will be praying for you but abit confused as to why you would put advertising in yuour posts for medical insurance.
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#5 Debp

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Posted 04 August 2012 - 05:42 PM

Mike, I have answered you in length in your Prayer Request topic. I hope you will read that soon.

You are welcome here, brother. We are not real busy at this forum, but the Christians we have are kind, sincere Christians.
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#6 Mike36

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Posted 05 August 2012 - 05:26 AM

Mike 36 , you say:

I'm praying that God will bring into my life the so needed true christian friends.I am not a strong person so when destruction comes my way all i can do is stay back and take it as it comes.I really have no tools to fight it(write me and i will tell you more why i do not have those tools).At this time i am going through the most toughest times of my life.You will not even believe(if i will tell you)through what i am going right now(simply contact me and i will tell you).


As a christian you do have many tools. and many weapons. Will be praying for you but abit confused as to why you would put advertising in yuour posts for medical insurance.



lilacday,

Nope,i do not have the tools to fight what has just comed in my way(in my life) !!!
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#7 Mike36

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Posted 05 August 2012 - 05:29 AM

Mike, I have answered you in length in your Prayer Request topic. I hope you will read that soon.

You are welcome here, brother. We are not real busy at this forum, but the Christians we have are kind, sincere Christians.



Dear Debp,

Thank you for your reply.I have sent you a friends request.I am glad to hear that the Christians that are present on this forums are sincere and very kind and i can say that i am already starting to see that ! Here is a smile from me in a long long time: :)
I will go to the Prayer Request topic now and read your answer.God bless you !
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#8 Debp

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Posted 07 August 2012 - 06:18 PM

Mike, I'm glad you will go there to read my answer. But I see you did not answer my question there. I asked if you attend a good, kind church so that you might confide with your pastor...to be helped and also, most importantly, to be built up in your faith.
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#9 carolannej

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Posted 29 September 2012 - 03:39 PM

Hi Mike
I feel akin to your pain in many ways. People don't always realise that some don't live in a place like their own. I live in a small village where there is no church for me to visit.
I have been through trial after trial since meeting my God 25yrs ago. My husband died 15yrs ago and I have raised my sons on my own since then, they are my life, the only things in mylife that are worth talking about, they are miracles, beautiful boys not of this world, outstanding, kind, loving and funny. But I found my 18yr old son dead in his bed on the Sabbath on 7/7/12
I have just read the coroner's report, he died of SADS [sudden adult/arrhythmical Death Sydrom. The report says my other children aged 15,12 have a 25-50% chanc of inheriting the same condition, basically could drop dead at any minit - and my 15yr old son knoes that - I baptised him myself in the bath the other day because there is nowhere/no one else to do it
this is by far the worst thing I have endured but I have also
my eldest son had a brain hemorridge as an infant I was in hospital 16weeks with him
I walked in on my husband sexually abusing my boys then aged 5 and 2 and I was 7months pregnant
he went to jail and thankfully died on release - it meant I didnt have to run away as I was told he would get supervised contact, then full contact after treatment
my baby girl was taken by relatives and never given back - I spent 2 years trying to get her back until I was exhausted [I went to the Court of Appeal here in England whiuch is the highest court but was told it was too late- what they'd done was illegal by taking her - it's not like the US where I would have got her back immediately
I raised my sons alone and made them the happiest children, God-fearing, God-loving, funny kids who everyone loved - now one is dead and I don't know how long I've got with the other one
[here is the site I've built for my son http://lukejesusjones.co.uk/ if anyone wants to check it out]
But .. you see Mike, I am telling you all this so that you know you are not the only one who feels the pain of loss and had to fight just to stay afloat sometimes - but, if you have access to the web all the time, let God use it to speak to you and no matter what you're feeling, He will show you something, maybe just an image or a captionor a story or a video - He speaks to me this way all the time, like clockwork -- Ive been OK, but the last 2 days have been haunted and non-accepting of what's happened .. but, just now, God has shown me something and I feel much better ... I know where my son is and who He is with and his death has caused many to stop and think. I homeschooled my boys through their senior years then Luke went to college at 16, his tutors said that he changed their lives, he made them think, he finished top of the year with a triple distinction which is the highest you can get and I am beru proud of what he achieved ... he was loved by many and was actually called Jesus by everyone, including his tutors .. so I think his death was timed, just when he finished college so it still impacted everyone there [he of started uni last week and I have to see all his friends starting and it satings me]
Ive made this mail all about me - but just so you realise that there are many people suffering in many ways - the victory is, to still say "Hallelujah" through all this, Blessed are those who weep. All you need is Christ - Hus love is the answer to everything and we need to learn to apply it no matter what happens and remember - all of this would have happened even if you or I didnt know God - we would be in the same position but then we would be very alone - I probably wouldnt have made it 30 yrs back [Ive only told you my recent history over past 18yrs but before that and through childhood I went through many trials
My younger son said to me that Luke didnt belong to just us, he belonged to everyone, which made me think back to when they were born and I gave them straight back to God - "not mine but yours oh Lord" - people don't belong to us do they ... as long as we don't blame God for our misfortunes, we're safe. My husband was part of a Church, sunday school and boys club .. all of that. Ilater found out that there'd been another incident and the church had decided to sweep it under the carpet but I dont blame God for their actions ... I blame them and pray for them
So .. I hope you hearing wsomeone else's problems has made you forget about your own for a while, at least whilst you read it anyway .. I too, have no family to fall back on or help me [apart from my mother who lives in Spain], I have my 15yr old son but I do hope and pray every day for Christ to take us all .. or just River and I .. so we could join Him and Luke .. I want my son back, I miss him so much, my heart is in a million pieces and will never be put back together in this life - never. This is the worst pain anyone could ever feel but I do have peace over my son's whereabouts and he didnt suffer so I am spared that pain - but still the wrench from my heart is worst than words can say
I'm glad Ive written all this, I feel the need to share with you the reality of other people who suffer and those who try to help ususally dont understand that some things cant be fixed - we can be helped with encouragment - we need to look upon our trials as triumphs and continue to praise God throughout - that is what we need to do - the situation cant be fixed but our attitude can
Please hold on, God is with you whether you realise it or not, He is carrying me right now so I cant see Him beside me
Because of Him
carolanne
If you want to talk to me, please do
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#10 Debp

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Posted 02 October 2012 - 05:22 PM

Carolanne, I'm glad you are trusting the Lord through all of your trials and that you also have the comfort of knowing your loved ones are with the Lord.

All of us have gone through some serious trials or illnesses, but the only thing that will get us through them is our faith in the Lord. That is what we sought to tell Mike. I hope you will read his other prayer request in the Prayer section called "My Life is Almost Over."

The Lord bless you for caring.
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#11 calicoskittens

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Posted 03 October 2012 - 03:35 AM

Hi Mike36. I wonder if you're still around? How is everything going? How is your health?
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#12 MUWANGUZI2020

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Posted 14 December 2012 - 10:06 AM

praying for you brother
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